Smart Toilets: The Personal Technology You Didn’t Know You Needed

Decorum demands that bathroom talk—if it happens at all—should remain in hushed tones.

An unfortunate side effect of this rather reasonable social request is that advancements in toilet technology remain hidden from the public at large.

We are here today to shine a light on the many modern amenities for cleanliness and comfort—from streaming audio to seven different spray positions—that today’s most advanced toilets afford users.

Toto Neorest 750H

What should you expect from a $10,000 toilet? Nothing less than the complete commode experience. The Neorest 750H by Toto features automated lid operation, automated flushing, automatic deodorizing, multiple bidet wash modes—including oscillating and pulsing comfort washing—and an adjustable heated seat. But the real magic comes after use, when the Neorest tackles the job no one wants to do—cleaning. Equipped with Actilight technology, a UV light system built into the lid, the Neorest sets to purifying your porcelain immediately post-usage. The Neorest further burnishes its cleaning credentials with a CeFiONtect ceramic glaze designed to repel waste, a misting system that employs electrolyzed water and a tornado flush—all ensuring your toilet will feel fresh for every use. All of this and the only hands-on activity users will need to engage in is the operation of the Neorest’s remote control.

The Neorest 750H is available for $10,200.

Kohler Numi

The tyranny of current toilet design—and, dare we say, outdated social mores—insists that toilets serve as purely utilitarian devices. If you’re looking to bring the club atmosphere into your private quarters, you won’t find a better option than the Numi by Kohler. In addition to sleek design and the standard features you’d expect of a high-tech toilet (multiple bidet spray functions, hands-free dryer, heated seat, deodorizer, self-cleaning features, etc.), the Numi provides audiovisual experience. Numi users can pair their smart devices with the commode via Bluetooth and play out music from their personal collection or any streaming service. What’s more, the Numi comes equipped with illuminated panels that can be set to cycle through a dynamic range of colors—or scheduled to display certain shades at specific times of day.

But the fun doesn’t stop with sound and vision. Numi owners will be treated to a motion-activated seat cover which lifts as you approach, a foot warmer to keep toes toasty on early mornings, and a multi-user database, so everyone in the family can enjoy their own custom toilet settings—from music and seat warmth to spray pattern and strength.

The Numi is available for $7,500.

Roca Inspira In-Wash

If simplicity (and a softer price point) is the goal, the Inspira In-Wash by Roca should more than suffice. Promising minimal design but maximal function, the In-Wash delivers on all accounts. The clean lines should allow the In-Wash, which is available in wall-hung and floor-standing versions, to be easily incorporated into any bathroom, while the unit provides multiple spray-cleaning functions with water temperature and intensity control, air drying with air temperature control, a self-cleaning nozzle, and a courtesy light. All of the In-Wash’s core functions can be controlled via a remote control that puts a premium on usability—big buttons and simple interface.

The Roca Inspira In-Wash is available for $2,083.

Brondell Swash 1400 Luxury Bidet Seat

Perhaps you already have a fine toilet, but would like to take advantage of a few of the modern amenities more contemporary commodes afford? The Swash 1400 Luxury Bidet Seat is designed to be easily installed on a wide range of existing toilets, comes loaded with all manner of futuristic features. Equipped with a stainless steel dual-nozzle system, the Swash provides a multitude of nozzle positions, spray strengths and spray widths, as well as an oscillation function. With a built-in warm air dryer, with adjustable air temperature, the Swash is fully capable of providing a paperless privy experience, regardless of when your toilet was built-in. The Swash is no slouch when it comes to cleanliness either. The unit’s nozzle system is self-cleaning, or can be sterilized on demand, and the seat includes an automated deodorizer. The Swash even features a built-in night light that illuminates the bowl for easy identification during nocturnal trips to the loo.

The Brondell Swash 1400 Luxury Bidet Seat is available for $649.